Hi everyone,Nesting Place held its "31 Days" challenge, and my contribution was "31 Days to a Great Marriage," and I'd like to share it with you.
After many years (50 to be exact) of marriage my husband, Duane and I, have learned a few things about what can not only make marriage a life-long blessing, but help a husband and wife get through some of the greatest challenges, greatest adventures, greatest heartaches, and just plain life experiences we all go through, and have them work together for good. This has been the case for us, and hopefully, what we've learned can bless your marriage.
So, begin here...
Index to 31 Days to a Great Marriage, for free.
How 31 Days to a Great Marriage works...
As you will note, the last post is Day 31, therefore to begin at the beginning (each day builds on the other) here is how to use this site as a resource to help your marriage become Great or Greater!
1. Start at the Index page using the tab above, which lists each Day by Title, and begin with Day 1.
2. Then follow along one day at a time.
3. Do the suggested 'activities'.
That's it!
Congratulations on being intentional on building your marriage!
P.S. In case you are wondering about who I am, here's a brief bio: I'm a wife, mother and now grandmother; I'm a radio talk show host and founder of The Center for Changing Worldviews, which works to educate on the cultural changes happening in our world that are tearing down the family, faith and our nation. I believe women have a very vital role to play in making a difference, and I love working with and encouraging women in their efforts. This site is obviously geared to strengthen marriages, which will strengthen families and ultimately nations. So enjoy and let me know what you think.
Well, you made it! Day 31 is here and that means today is...
DAY 31: TO A GREAT MARRIAGE - Vow #3 'Til Death Do Us Part
This final wedding vow: I take you to be my wedded wife/husband, to have and to hold, from this day forward...'til death do us part.
To have (you are the one I will go through life with forever)
To hold (embrace & cling to every day of our lives)
From this day forward (beginning now) and until...
'Til Death Do Us Part
It's what we all want, right? "And they lived happily ever after." Of course, there are situations where wedding vows are broken and divorce happens. This was the case with my mother and father. Both of them came from very dysfunctional families. There was a lot of abuse that they both experienced, and they entered into their marriage both broken people. Mix that with two wars my father was part of, a very sick child (my older sister contracted encephalitis at the age of 2 and was hospitalized until her adult years), well...you get the picture.
But, real life situations like this and others, do not mean divorce is imminent. As a matter of fact, I agree with marriage expert, Jimmy Evans, author of "When Life Hurts" and "Lifelong Love Affair" at marriagetoday.com that anyone can have a marriage that gets better, no matter what life throws at them...if they will let God help them work through the pain. He says, we have to deal with pain the right way, and that left to our own devices we always deal with it in the wrong way.
Evans' insights into Untreated Wounds and Inner Vows are very good, and I believe that if my parents had had resources such as these there could have been a different outcome for them.
Marriage is the longest contractual agreement (commitment) we will ever make or have. And we can be successful in keeping it...'til death do us part'...with the right help from good, reliable sources such as I've included each day of our 31 Days to a Great Marriage together...and from God.
So, today set up a time to reaffirm your love vows to each other, in some way. You can make it a big affair, (some couples renew their vows on their anniversary), or it can be an intimate time with the two of you simply telling each other of your love for one another, again.
I hope you will use/revisit these 31 Days to a Great Marriage ideas and suggestions from 'this day forward.' If you've been with me throughout this time, you have seen the results and benefits...which can only continue to increase as you apply them to, and invest in, your marriage. If you do, I am confident that you will have a Great Marriage...that will last a lifetime.
Congratulations!
I'd love to hear from you about your journey via email @ sharon@changingworldviews.com.
Thanks for traveling on this journey with me (and Duane) :)
Well, how did you do yesterday with Day 14 -- Use Affirming Words? It is probably one of the best things you can do not just for your marriage, but for your life!
Okay, today's suggestion for a Great Marriage is to...
DAY 15: TO A GREAT MARRIAGE - Find the Happy Spot!
“For the two of us, home isn’t a place. It is a person. And we are finally home.” ―Stephanie Perkins
When it comes to marriage, the above statement says alot. When you are happy in marriage it doesn't matter where you live, or what kind of house you live in, how much money you have to decorate and buy new furniture with, et al., because your house is not your home. You are going through life with someone you love and who loves you, and (as the plaque in my kitchen says) "Love is a beautiful place to live."
Now, lest I sound totally Pollyanna, let me add that, sad to say it can take years before a couple realizes this truth. But, it doesn't have to. Happiness in marriage results from going through ALL of life together, lovingly, and the resultant "Happy Spot" can be realized any time. Check this out - 10 "Things Happy Couples Do Differently"...
1. They make plenty of time for each other.
2. They don’t beat around the bush.
3. They meet in the middle and work together.
4. Their actions consistently backup their claims of love.
5. They respect each other’s humanness.
6. They focus on what they like about each other.
7. There is far more between them than physical attraction.
8. They resolve conflicts through love, not retaliation.
9. They open up to each other, especially in trying times.
10. They are committed to growing together.
The author has some good things to say about each point, and wraps up with...
"The best relationships are not just about the good times you share, they’re also about the obstacles you go through together, and the fact that you still say “I love you” in the end. And loving someone isn’t just about saying it every day, it’s showing it every day in every way."
So, for today go over the list of "10 Things Happy Couples Do Differently" together and discuss how you are doing in each area and what you need to do to find the "Happy Spot."
And we can't talk about becoming a happy couple without pointing out again that the happiest couples are the ones that have God central in their marriages -- which gives them a real edge on finding the "Happy Spot." (for more on this See Day 13)
Thanks!
